Tuesday, July 21, 2009

My heart hurts :( really badly

Had an absolutely wonderful date with Eric on thursday.

Got hardcore blown off saturday.

Ignored on sunday.

"We need to talk" on monday.

Very confused and hurt. still no official break-up talk. without explanation. surprised. shocked. saddened. lost.

my heart hurts :(

stupid girl, fall in love just to have your heart broke a short while later. at least i fell in love with someone i wanted to. no matter how short of duration.

God, this one's all yours, I can't handle this one on my own. I need your strength and love for guidance and healing and protection. Please take care of Eric's heart and mind. I feel he's very confused too right now. I care about him too much to see him in any pain as well. I pray this is all your will and that your will be done, no matter how much I don't like it and it hurts. Thank you for my many blessings in life. Thank you for my health. I saw Rain today and it made me realize just how much I need to value my health and my life. Not everyone has that gift. Thank you for my nephew. Even through my choked tears he was able to bring a hearty laugh to my face and complete love to my heart. Thank you for family, for being there in times of need. Thank you for my eyes for getting to open them this morning to the beauty of this earth. Thank you for the chance at love with all my heart. Lord, please watch over and take care of my heart, I really need it. Please watch over and take care of Eric's heart. Please provide comfort for us both, whatever reason this is happening. Between family troubles, Eric and this rough transition period in my life, I give it all up to you Lord. I've reached my emotional threshold. I can't do it on my own, don't want to do it on my own. I need your help. Thank you for eternal life, no matter how undeserved. I make too many mistakes to deserve your love and guidance but I receive it anyway, just because I ask. Thank you Lord for all my blessings, no matter how small or big, no matter how many I recognize or don't. Thank you Lord. In Christ's name, Amen.

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