Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Now THAT'S What I Call A Day For The Books!!

Welp, you ever just have one of THOSE days?! And by those days I mean the ones where you are absolutely not winning by any means, are just so completely frazzled, yet the sun is still somehow shining out of your ass and you find yourself laughing your way through the day?!?!

Yeah?! Well that was my day!

Ok ok ok, most days are like that for me. But today was an extreme!!

I got to work expecting to be a ward clerk...because, well....because that's what my CNE (clinical nurse educator) told me I would be doing. I haven't been cross-trained as a Healthcare Tech yet (officially) and thought that was coming at a later date. But due to conflicts (basically caused by the indiscrepency in my position title and it lacking half of it as I'm the first to be fully cross-trained), it was do-or-die time.

You wanna learn?! Well jump in head first! And today I was shoved in head first...and I basically ended up belly-flopping but that's really beside the point....

So I worked the floor. I learned how to do vitals (which might I add that machine was almost the death of me might be simple but it's lethal!), do the boards, do intake/output, and run in a million different directions. I learned to chart. I learned how to distribute trays, set up a room, all that jazzy shit they teach you.

BUT I learned it while learning how to ungracefully drop a tray, how to run into walls, how to run around in circles (quite literally, I mean that sincerely), how to ask a sheriff where to find shampoo, and most importantly, how to lock myself in a correctional care room.

However, I did it all with a smile on my face. For realz, laughter is the only thing that gets me through. I laugh at any and every thing. I laugh when I make mistakes, I laugh when people tell jokes, I laugh at myself, I sing, I dance, I make corny jokes, and put in ridiculous movie lines/song lyrics when necessary. And it pays off!! I had everyone in my unit in a good mood...despite my many many mistakes today. I was frazzled beyond belief but hey it's all good!!

And let's just not forget the most memorable part of my day. Well we had this new admit. We knew he'd be a "sitter" patient and that he was all sorts of coo-koo ca-choo. He came in and did not fail to deliver! He came down in 4-pt cuff restraints from the ED. After unhooking him he leaped to the other bed and next thing I know, all sorts of stuff starts happening and five sheriff's are on top of him. Apparently he started pulling out his IV, then tried to bite it, then tried to bite one of the sheriff's, then started fighting, and, like whoa!! Crazy, scary and thrilling all at once! And what was my reaction?! Oh you guessed it, I laughed.

Then I had to help insert a foley. A catheter. Into his penis. There's a first for everything. Oh and then he peed so much!! He peed 900mL in the catheter but there was so much coming out an additional 300mL came out around the catheter!! So we had to clean him up, change his bed...hmmm, what glorious fun!! And what did I do?! Sang a ridiculous song and laughed!

Doc: What's up?!
Me: the ceiling

Never gets old! Such a smartass.

But I will say, the power of please and thank you and asked nicely, so totally amazing!! The sheriff's love me because of my attitude and my joking demeanor and my corny jokes. And I think my staff all does too. I can joke with most all of them, pretty easily. Tis quite glorious!!

Welp, that was definitely a day for the books. Bet tomorrow will be too. An adventure is in store I'm sure. Which means I need some sleep to prepare for it.

Off to Never Never Land I go. Tout a'leure and sweet dreams :-)

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