I sit here writing a week into my two-week break from school. The week has gone by rather too fast but it's also been a very odd week...full of a lot of plans but to be honest I was so used to only having school-related stuff that I had no idea what to do for the first day I was on break.
The first 15 weeks were long, hard, full, and busy. So jam-packed with stuff that I look back amazed at how far we came in that 15 weeks.
My first rotation was Med/Surg...and while I loved the content, I ended up hating the class and had a hard time with my clinicals. My professor ended up having a target on me from the start of my class, and she wasn't the best professor I've ever had. As a matter of fact, I rather have a personal opinion that teaching may not be the realm for her. Someone who likes to tout their credentials, has no idea what they are talking about in some classes, and who passively-aggressively targets students (all still while touting her "Christian" faith) isn't suited for a classroom, let alone one that should be safe and supportive for future professionals in the field!! Regardless, I came out of the class with a B, which is pretty damn good if I do say so myself.
I did find at the end of the 15 weeks that I really just needed a break. As someone who loves peace, calm, serenity, and positivity, I started finding myself becoming rather frustrated and aghast at the amount of stress and frazzled-ness that people in this program exert. I have a hard time being too worked up and stressed out all the time, and being so consumed in that culture was becoming overbearing. I have a hard time taking most things in life too seriously, as an end-all to everything, that I just was burnt out. I needed to get away from that scene, away from the people that became the only people who ever saw me.
On top of that, my confidence was shot at the end. Between my professor finding ways to passively-aggressively belittle me and feeling like a failure at clinicals half the time, I found much excitement in getting away from that all!!
And I have thoroughly enjoyed the past week!! I changed up my hair (I couldn't handle feeling like a stepford wife anymore in the sea that is nursing school students), I hiked, and I've worked on some projects! This next week is full of taking pictures, more projects, and socializing :-)
I refurbished the cradle for my brother's baby on the way, finished some pillows...next on the docket: a baby blanket, the high chair, and building a vanity!!
I'm using these two weeks to getting back to who I am, what makes me happy, and what is important in my life. Because I'm here to tell you, being a nurse is not my defining factor! No, what makes my life important and beautiful is the people in it, how hard I work, and appreciating the simple things. There's so much beauty that I can't possibly let nursing school be the end-all and only.
Because I'm having a hard time sitting still, this is all for this post...onward to getting more things achieved for now!